[John Sulllivan's Just Good Friends]

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Season 1
[01]
[02]
[03]
[04]
[05]
[06]
[07]

Season 2
[08]
[09]
[10]
[11]
[12]
[13]
[14]

Special
[15]

Season 3
[16]
[17]
[18]
[19]
[20]
[21]
[22]

[Production]

[Glossary]

[World Of]

[Talk]

Giggles

Exterior - Day - Shepherd & dog

[Waitress]Penny is nervously awaiting the arrival of Vince in a pub beer garden - he arrives in the BMW and kisses her embarrassingly

PENNY
"Do you have to do that sort of thing in public"
VINCE
"Fraid so Pen - don't ask me why I'm a complex sort of guy"

There is a party of Japanese business men observing them

PENNY
"Not in the middle of Chipping Ongar ... Half the Datsun factory'll know about this by next week"
PENNY
"You invite me to lunch and with in 10 seconds you've reduced me to a tourist attraction with a ringing wet ear."

For the last 2 weeks Vince has been trying to contact Penny without success

PENNY
"You probably thought you'd offended me"
VINCE
"No I just put it down to pig ignorance"

Penny has been worried about the relationship since they stayed the night together

VINCE
"We must be very important to you then"
PENNY
"I hadn't really thought about it"

Penny is embarrassed

PENNY
"I want you forget what happened the other weekend"
VINCE
"Why what happened ?"

Penny reminds him of the night they spent together

PENNY
"I don't want you thinking after what happened you have some kind of license"
VINCE
"You mean I failed the test"

She is really adamant

PENNY
"It was an isolated incident like that film simply "Saturday Night and Sunday morning""
VINCE
"and Sunday afternoon"
PENNY
"forget it"

Interior - Day - Pub

[Vincent]Penny has received a letter from Graham's (ex-husband) solicitor putting the divorce back - she is anxious to be rid of him.

Vince assures her there's no hurry but she is not taking any advice from the non marrying kind

VINCE
"I won't mind getting married if the right girl came along"
PENNY
"there must be somebody out there for you - there must be"

The letter spooked Penny as it was addressed to her married name which Vince is trying to find out

PENNY
"You said it wasn't important"
VINCE
"Well It wasn't important but it is now ... You had a clunky name"
PENNY
"... his name was Pratt"
VINCE
"Nice melon fancy seeing a movie in the week it'll make a change ... So you were Mrs Pratt.. Mrs Pratt"

Penny is not amused

PENNY
"After 6 months of marriage Graham changed his name by deed pole to Perry."
VINCE
"What Perry Pratt ?"
PENNY
"First I was penny Pratt then I was Penny Perry if I married you I would have been Penny Pinner"
VINCE
"Look for the silver lining Pen If you hadn't married Graham we couldn't have committed adultery last week"

Vince cant understand why Penny wants to forget about the weekend as she didn't want to commit herself yet they almost lived together.

PENNY
"And Looked what happened to it .. it could of been a sign of something"
VINCE
"It was a sign of something - a sign you forgotten to lock the front door"

Penny has been accepting advice from home

VINCE
"Oh mummy stuck her two pennies worth in might guessed the Witch Queen of New Orleans would be be behind this you know she's never been the same since she took that Open University course in advanced voodoo"

Vince is staying at his parents Penny wants rid of the flat - he has already sold the lease. He gives her a cheque for her half

PENNY
"I don't want the money ... Is that all?"
PENNY
"You could have at least consulted me"
VINCE
"I did what do you think what all the phone calls and messages were about"

Penny is offended he was taking about selling the flat and not about them

PENNY
"Didn't last weekend mean anything to you ?"
VINCE
"I've forgotten all about that Pen"
PENNY
"How could you ever forget?"
VINCE
"You told me to forget about it"

Vince is annoyed she never remembers the good things he has done - he sees himself as a mentor of life. Penny is adamant she has learnt nothing from him as she had a good private education.

VINCE
"When I met you you were like an innocent little virgin who knew nothing about life"
PENNY
"That's because I was an innocent little virgin who knew nothing about life.. but we soon put a stop to all that nonsense Eh Vincent"
VINCE
"You used to wear Gingham dresses - sandals plats and you had braces on your teeth ... you looked more like a cabbage patch doll"
PENNY
"Why did you make such a play for me"
VINCE
"I was going through a kinky stage"

Penny tips beer over Vince and throws her napkin

VINCE
"For a minute there I thought you were going to overreact"

Interior - Night - Pub

[Tom]Lennie enters the pub and Tom the barman Tom asks him to take Vince away. he is sitting singing to himself for "too bloody long" and spending the last few hours trying to light a plastic cigarette.

Vince rises to meet Lennie and knocks over some glasses much to the amusement of the other customers.

The barman Tom comes to sweep it up and Vince tries to pick a fight. Lennie stops him

LENNIE
"You never won a fight in your life"
VINCE
"Aint i .. I'll let him off then"
LENNIE
"What's the matter with you Vince I aint seen you like this .. for weeks"
PENNY
"Its Lady Penelope.. she left me sitting there all covered in Lager .. she didn't even kiss me goodbye - don't love me no more"

Vince reveals a dark secret

PENNY
"The Warrenders - they're Martians Daphne the mother is the chief Martian - she outranks Darth Vader .. Penny is sometimes I;'ve seen he transom into Scarlet O Hara .. There not all Martians Norman the one who they pretend is the father is a droid hes got little wheels under his slippers."
PENNY
"I love her she don't love me."

Vince launches into a tirade about not having children

LENNIE
"I lean you against the wall and I'll call you a cab"
VINCE
"Its alright Len I've got the car outside."

Vince decides to go and see Penny he dashes off before Lennie can stop him

LENNIE
"Come back here"
TOM
"Don't you dare"

Exterior - Night - Warrender's House

[Lennie]Lennie manages to get Vince to let him drive but he insists on going round to Penny's house.

VINCE
"If you want to make a plum of yourself you go right ahead and do it"
VINCE
"Cheers Lennie you're a pal - here you are you can have my car"

Lennie storms off and Vice heads towards the Warrender's house but falls over into a shrub by the door. A PC walks up to him and asks diplomatically

PC
"Feeling one degree under are we sir ?"
VINCE
"No I'm just pissed officer"

Interior - Night - Warrender's House

[PC]The doorbell rings and Penny runs downstairs to answer it

PENNY
"Who is it ?"
PC
"Its the police"
NORMAN
"Who is it darling ?"
PENNY
"Its the police"
DAPHNE
"Wwho is it Norman ?"
NORMAN
"its the police"

Penny opens the door and the PC starts to inform her about Vince mistaking him for Graham

PC
"Its your husband madam - suffering from spasmodic paralysis of the legs"

Penny is truly concerned until Vince pops his head round the door at knee level

VINCE
"Hia Pen"
PENNY
"Oh hell - this isn't my husband"
PC
"You mean you don't know this man"
VINCE
"Yes I know him were sort of ... friends"
PC
"That's a bit embarrassing - is your husband in?"
PENNY
"No my husband and I have parted"
PC
"Oh I see this is your FRIEND"
PENNY
"Yes ah no ah"

Norman arrives saving Penny's blushes any further - the PC assumes it her husband and tactfully suggests

PC
"A drunk has wandered onto your property"
PENNY
"Its Vince daddy"
PC
"Oh this is your FATHER"

The PC starts to bundle Vince into the house when Daphne enters the fray

DAPHNE
"Oh my god"
VINCE
"Give us a kiss Daphne"

Daphne refuse to let him in until the PC says he would have summon end for assistance

NORMAN
"A black maria couple squads car seems a shame to wake all the neighbours up at this time of night"
DAPHNE
"The neighbours - oh my god the neighbours - fetch it in"
VINCE
"Be careful officer their Martians"

Daphne lays into Penny about how this behaviour will bring her down

VINCE
"Tell me Daphne as an outsider - What do you think of the human race ?"

Daphne wants "it" out the way

PENNY
"Lets get you up stairs to bed"
VINCE
"On no not bed again Pen"

[Norman and Daphne] Daphne and Norman are horrified as Vince spill the beans on what Penny has been trying to make him forget and in front of her parents.

The PC is laughing

PC
"If you have anymore trouble you know what to do - hit him with something"

The PC leaves

NORMAN
"I feel I should do something to help"
DAPHNE
"Pop outside to the garden shed and get the garden hose"

Norman is about to undress him but Daphne says its Penny responsibility until the image of her undressing him come to mind and she sends Norman upstairs to help.

Exterior - Day - Toot Hill

[Penny]The next morning Vince is nursing a hangover Penny wants an explanation

PENNY
"Its not like you - well it is like you"
VINCE
"I was drunk"
PENNY
"That explains all the falling into the hydrangea and the throwing up in the bidet"

Vince tries to rationalise it

VINCE
"When I'm sober I invariably do or say the wrong thing"
PENNY
"And when your drink you don't ?"
VINCE
"When I'm drunk I don't care"

Vince starts really grovelling he compares reacting to the episode with the lager to the wedding that never was but this time he didn't jump on his bike and

VINCE
"ride off into the sunset - For 2 reasons (1) because I was low on petrol and (2) I realised I couldn't leave you - I'm afraid you're lumbered with me"
PENNY
"why is it every time you want to bare your soul I'm the one who has to hold the bucket?"
PENNY
"You are a lying lecherous drunken ratfink"
VINCE
"I've got me bad points as well pen"

He starts the inevitable teasing by saying he has bought her a cabbage patch doll.

Penny asks hiom abotu an incident in the pas when he drove to Canvey Island "the big crab apple".

He says he regrets it and makes light of it this shatters the momentary harmony they have found

VINCE
"I was only joking pen"
PENNY
"No you weren't you were thinking of your rotten self again"

She demands to be taken home.

He starts a scarlet O Hara impression which does not go down to well - she storms off and Vince adds

VINCE
"The quickedest route home is through a shortcut in the woods"
PENNY
"I'm not going through there a man might jump out on me"
VINCE
"Just tell him you're not ready to commit yourself yet"

Vince refuses to give her a lift

The credits roll as they walk back to the car.

Penny runs ahead and sits in the car

VINCE
"What are you playing at pen?"
PENNY
"I'm not moving from here"
VINCE
"Come of out there will you"
PENNY
"I'm staying here"
VINCE
"Alright stay there then"

[Family]Vince walks off and Penny starts looking at some loose photos in the car she sees in them a family ressembling one playing in a nearby field.

Vince drives past in HIS car Penny bolts out and gets in it and cant resist giggling.


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